Strange Love
by Gingerbread Owl
Summary: Zim and Dib face off for the final battle and the winner names the prize. Dib wants to expose Zim, Zim wants to have Dib locked up in a mental asylum. Or dead. Either would do really. But of course, nothing goes according to plan... ZADR.
1. Strange Love

**_STRANGE LOVE_ **

_DEDICATED TO VIKKI  
Who introduced me to the love that is ZADR_

I have heard that Irkens cannot feel love and that they do not need sleep however I'm not sure if Jhonen Vasquez himself did say this or if they are just theories people have come up with. Anyway, in the light of uncertainty and the freedom to use my imagination even if I am wrong, here are my theories:

I believe Irkens can feel love, as proven by Zim's cry of: "I love you cold unfeeling robot arm!" in 'Parent Teacher Night' and how he knows what affection is (even though he seems disgusted by the very idea!) in 'Tak: The Hideous New Girl' I believe that they pretend love doesn't exist because love can cause complications that a race of galaxy conquerors could probably rather do without.

Human love is probably different to Irken love; they may have different ways of showing affection and of expressing their feelings. I believe that this is why Zim wanted to study his "relationship" with Tak, to observe how humans handle love.

Although Irkens may not need sleep they can probably doze or nap since in the episode where Zim and GIR get lost in the city, Zim stares at the sun and then seems to take a nap whilst waiting for his eyes to heal.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this fic. Alas, 'tis a pity.

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**CHAPTER 1- STRANGE LOVE**

"Alright, Zim! This is it! The final battle! Just you and me…" Dib glared at the Irken Invader and tensed his body, ready to attack. This was it, the moment he had longed for for so long; the chance to expose Zim for what he really was! They had reached a mutual agreement. A fight. A simple bare-fisted fight between the alien and the human and the winner would name their prize. Dib wanted to expose Zim, Zim wanted to have Dib locked up in a mental asylum. Or dead. Either would do really. The arena was an old railway that hadn't been used for years so that Zim could fight without disguise. Dib's eyes narrowed at the alien. What is he thinking? He wondered. What diabolical plan is forming in his evil alien mind?

Zim stared at Dib. What a big head that human has, he thought. I mean, _really_ big. It's not even huge, it's gigantic! The Irken invader had a simple plan to win. Gaz was the referee and GIR liked Gaz. The plan was simple. Use GIR to distract the human so that Zim could crush Dib once and for all! He laughed manically and then stopped when he realised that he was doing so out loud. Dib's eyes narrowed even further. Zim glared back. Gaz sighed. This was such a waste of time. But she had complied because Dib had promised her a new video game of her choice. And a takeaway pizza.

"Ready, steady go," she said expressionlessly.

"Yaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggggghhhhhhhh!" Dib and Zim launched themselves at each other, arms outstretched and fists flailing. Gaz watched with mild interest. Dib wasn't a bad fighter and Zim was no worse.

"Urgh! Get your filthy human hands out of my eyes, earth worm!" screamed Zim as Dib accidentally poked a large red eye. Dib simply laughed insanely and poked the other eye. Zim's eyes narrowed and he pulled Dib's glasses off.

"My glasses! I can't see!" Dib cried, waving his arms around pathetically in the air.

"GIR! Now!" cried Zim.

"Yessiiiir!" The robot walked over to Gaz who had lost interest in the fight and was now staring into space wondering whether this boredom was really worth a new video game and pizza. Maybe if the pizza was extra large…

"Helloooo!"

Gaz looked down at GIR and sighed.

"I'm gonna dance for you!" GIR announced and proceeded to do so, singing an extremely annoying song at the same time. Gaz watched, unimpressed.

"No! Gaz! It's a trick! Don't watch!" Dib screamed at her but at that moment Zim pulled out a blaster and pointed it at the centre of Dib's forehead. It was too big a target to miss. Zim tossed Dib his glasses.

"Now, earth boy, it is over! ZIM has won!"

"But! But you cheated!"

"Foolish human! Did you really believe I would play by your rules! Zim is above human rules! Now surrender!"

Dib glanced over at Gaz who was still looking sceptically at GIR. The sound of a train could be heard in the distance.

"Your sister cannot help you now! She fell for the distraction as only a human as stupid as her would! Now beg for mercy!"

"I will never beg for mercy from you! I wouldn't get it anyway. It would just be a pointless humiliating experience to give you more opportunity to gloat!"

"You are surprisingly accurate. My intention is not grant you mercy but blow your tiny brain out of your big head!"

"MY HEAD IS NOT BIG!"

Zim laughed and his finger moved towards the trigger but he didn't fire. He couldn't. Zim had made a mistake in insulting Gaz. She had crept up behind him and now she tapped the alien on the shoulder and as he turned she punched him. Hard. Dib gave a cheer and then groaned as Zim accidentally shot him in the arm. Gaz glared at the alien and then turned back to GIR who was laughing at his master and eating salted peanuts. Gaz liked peanuts. The sound of the train approaching grew louder.

Zim took the opportunity to jump to his feet, push Dib over and as the train rushed past, jumped onto it and laughed triumphantly as the train sped away.

"So long, Dib!" His laughter was cut short when Dib said from an area near his feet, "I'm right here you idiot."

Zim stared down at the human.

"What? How did you-?" Zim checked himself and, changing tone, cried out, "Ha! I have tricked you once again human swine! I have kidnapped you!"

Dib blinked up at the Irken Invader and slowly sat up. Attached to his arm was a mechanical claw with a wire cable leading back to Zim's blaster. Zim looked at the cable. He pulled out the blaster and another identical space weapon from his pack. He looked at them.

"I appear to have fired the grapple hook instead of the blaster. Oh well, Zim still wins!"

Funny, I thought this railway was abandoned, thought Dib.

"You left your robot behind," he commented aloud.

"GIR will find his own way back to base. Now, it all ends here, Dib. As you can see, I have clearly won and that means you either die or accept admittance to an asylum. Your choice."

"Why are you giving me a choice?" Dib asked, glaring suspiciously at Zim.

"Because I can then grant the opposite of what you want! And don't go saying the opposite of what you want so that I will think that is what you want and grant you the other one, which is the one you really want because I may grant you that one anyway, regardless of which one you really want!"

Dib blinked at him again and said, "Alright. But will you please remove this claw from my arm, it's kind of painful."

"No," said Zim and laughed. Dib stood up and swayed as the wind buffered him. Suddenly Zim's large eyes grew even wider. Dib turned to look, gave a yell and threw himself down. Unfortunately he was too close to Zim and landed on him.

"Get off me, Dib!" But the train sped screaming into a tunnel and Dib was forced to lie still for fear of being thrown off. He closed his eyes and held on to the train as best he could. Zim closed his eyes in disgust and fear, not liking the feeble grip he had on the train. They were stuck like that for a long time, similar thoughts running through their heads.

_Stupid Zim and his stupid kidnapping plan. It wasn't even a plan at all, just an accident. Who knows where we're headed and how long this stupid tunnel is and we'll have to stay like this? Hmm, Zim smells strange. Not unpleasant but strange... Wait. Why on earth am I thinking about the way Zim smells at a time like this? Concentrate Dib! The train could burst into the open at any moment and Zim doesn't have his disguise on! Then he will be exposed for what he really is! Ahahahahahaa! But I am tired after all that fighting and Zim is weirdly comfortable to lie on…_

_Stupid Dib and his stupid getting caught in my grapple hook. Now we're stuck like this until we come out of this stupid tunnel and who knows how long it is?  
_  
"DIB! Stop wriggling!"  
_  
He's going to throw us both off! And then that would be the end of Invader Zim! NEVER! I must hold on to this train, I can't let the Tallest down! Hmm, odd. If I keep still then this is almost comfortable. Dib's head is a reassuring weight that I can use to stop myself from rolling off. In fact, this is strangely relaxing…_

The rain whistled out into the open but Dib and Zim didn't notice. They were both so relaxed that neither noticed that the reason they saw blackness was because they had their eyes closed and they had become so soothed by the rhythmic rocking of the train and the oddly pleasant sensation of being with the other that, exhausted from their battle, they had half dozed off, relaxed in each other's company for the first time. Zim opened his eyes first and stared at Dib who was still lying on top of him. He didn't move for a few minutes until he noticed Dib stirring then,

"GET YOUR DISGUSTING BODY OFF ME, DIB-STINK!"

Dib was startled into a rude awakening and leapt up from Zim as though he had been struck by lightening. The Irken Invader jumped to his feet and the pair glared at each other, hate burning in their eyes. Neither could think of anything to say so they simply glared, annoyed at showing vulnerability in the face of the enemy. The train began to slow and both realised that they were drawing into a station. They could hear the sound of a train moving away from the station on the other side of the track. Dib glanced down at the grass beside the track and then back at Zim. Zim's eyes narrowed and then widened again as he realised what the human was going to do.

"No! Dib!" but Dib had already jumped. Zim was forced to quickly let go of the grapple hook. He glared after Dib then hurriedly jumped on the train going the opposite way. As he passed Dib he laughed triumphantly and Dib screamed back at him, "I'll get you someday Zim! Just you wait! I'll get you someday!"

The train travelled back past the place Zim and Dib had used as an arena and as Zim passed GIR jumped up to join his master. Gaz shrugged, turned away and walked home. Back in his base, exhausted from the day's events, Zim collapsed onto the sofa, unable to stop thinking of Dib and how much he annoyed him.

"Curse you, Dib!" he cried to the air. "I hate that little worm," he muttered to GIR.

Dib had finally trudged his way home, placed the grapple hook on his bedside table and gone to bed, tired and unable to stop thinking about Zim and his annoying habit of escaping before Dib could expose him.

"I hate you, Zim!" he yelled to the ceiling. Both lay awake, thinking of their enemy, plotting and hating. All the while subconsciously loving to hate and hating to love. A strange love.

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What do you think? Should I write more? Send me a review and let me know! 


	2. Wicked Game

Inspiration finally struck so I now know where I want to go with this. If anyone thinks this is similar to Because We Understand it's because I wrote both stories at the same time. Sorry for the wait, I've been on holiday enjoying the lovely sunshine in the south of France :P A huge thank you to my reviewers:

**Circus Freak92- I AM GIR**: Thank you, sorry for the wait, I was unable to update whilst on holiday but I did write a lot! I hope this chapter makes up for the wait.

**Pit bears rock (four brindle drive):** Thank you :)

**Mongoose:** Thank you, I tried hard to keep them in character I'm pleased to know I succeeded! I didn't think it felt like enough either so here you are; the next chapter...

**Mystery Reviewer:** Interesting eh? You know, many people have said that yet I still can't grasp why! Thank you!

**Katca Mcadar: **I know; they're just so sweet together. I adore love/hate relationships... ;)

**crazy kitsune17:** Thank you :) I hope that you like this fic as much as a chapter story as you did as a one shot!

**Aseret Kitsune: **Your wish is my command...

**Little Suzi: **Thank you that's exactly what I'm trying to show :)

**andalitebandit-6: **That's why I love Zim, he never admits he's wrong or has screwed up! I obey! I obey!

**Uru Baen: **There you go! Sorry for the wait!

**flying metal child: **Thank you :) it gets a little less subtle now though!

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**CHAPTER 2- WICKED GAME**

It had been two weeks since the 'Final Battle.' Zim and Dib had already forgotten it, both convinced they had won and simply reverted back to petty insults. Dib lay on his bed, silently fuming. Unable to tear his mind away from the green skinned alien wondering for the millionth time why people couldn't see what was so obvious to him.

"It's simple Dib Stink," Zim had hissed after Dib had yet again screamed his frustration. "Your filthy race only sees what it wants to see and only believe what they want to believe."

But why? Dib had wondered, why? Zim had given him an answer to that too.

"No one wants to accept that aliens exist on this planet because of the panic and the disruption it would cause. Face it, you're fighting a losing battle for a race that doesn't even care."

"You're lying Zim!" He had yelled, glaring at the alien for this horribly accurate description of humanity.

"You can't deny it! How many nights have you lain awake in your bed, wondering what Zim was plotting since I arrived? How many hours do you spend trying to defeat me? You know the truth, Dib, and you're restless because of it. When doom arrives for this pitiful planet people want to be unprepared. They know that if an alien race, with technology far superior to their own," (here Zim had paused smugly for a moment as if recalling the greatness of the Irken army) "should invade, that they would lose and they would rather not know the end was coming until the last possible moment so that they don't have to admit that there is no hope. Hope is all that keeps your people going, if they lose it then they lose everything. Plus, they are afraid of what they don't know." Zim looked disgusted by the pathetic race he was describing.

"That's ridiculous," Dib had spat, finding his voice at last, "why do you think we study the universe so intently? Why do you think we have developed nuclear weapons? They aren't just for destroying humans, Zim! We are prepared for whatever may happen."

"Dib, Dib, Dib…" Zim had shaken his head in mock pity, "if they're so prepared and eager to find proof of alien existence then how come even your stupid Swollen Eyeballs don't believe you?"

"They did! They gave me a chance to present my case study on you! I just… just screwed it up." Dib cringed, he had hoped never to admit that to Zim but it was better that the alien thought him stupid that the whole human race. It backfired.

"Good example! A human has evidence and then he goes and messes it up! You and your people are pathetic Dib."

He had taken a step closer, and then another and another. Dib stumbled backwards suddenly feeling horribly vulnerable. Zim advanced, his expression unreadable but a strange mixture of anger, pity, hate, and pleasure at tormenting the Dib reflected in his eyes. Dib wanted to move backwards, run away, anything but let Zim come any closer but an inconvenient wall had prevented him. Zim was so close now that Dib's nose would have been touching his, if Zim had had one.

Dib knew he was trembling, but not with fear. His mouth went horribly dry and he knew that Zim was a) right and b) uncomfortably close. If only he would just move away… But a little treacherous part of Dib also knew that he didn't want him to. Dib tried to shake that thought but it refused to go away. He swallowed nervously. Zim had sensed his confusion but did not seem to guess the real reason since he drew back and walked away, smirking as he spoke.

"You know I'm right, Dib. Give it up, it's just crazy to continue. Yes… crazy. See you on Monday!" He added brightly and strolled out of sight, savouring the word 'crazy'.

Dib had stayed where he was for a long time, trying to push away the memory of how he had wanted to pull Zim closer. He shut his eyes against the sight of Zim's face so close to his own that it seemed to have melted permanently into his vision. And those eyes; bright, burning eyes, ruby red behind their lenses that had gazed intently into his own, causing shivers to run down his spine. He was extremely grateful that this was after Skool hours and the only reason they had not left for home was because they had been arguing for half an hour, ever since the bell had rung. Dib trudged homewards alone, Gaz having long since left.

Now Dib lay on his bed furiously trying to think of anything except Zim. The problem was that he usually never stopped thinking about him so this was now extremely hard to do. Dib glared at the ceiling and then, realising that he hadn't stopped glaring since he'd arrived home, stopped in fear of making the expression permanent. He massaged his temples trying once again to banish all thoughts of Zim. But the memory of his face, tantalisingly close to his own, his eyes burning with pent up passion and the tingling feel of Zim's body heat was driving him crazy. There. He'd even admitted it to himself, he was crazy.

Dib groaned in frustration. Then enlightenment struck. Maybe the way to deal with these unwanted thoughts was to face them and conquer them, like the way one overcomes a fear. Dib sat up excitedly and then settled back down and thought about what he needed to think about. Ok, what exactly is it that I feel? In other words, what do I want to do with Zim? When was I first conscious of these feelings? Why could I possibly be feeling this way? Using these reasons how can I overcome these feelings?

Dib ignored the little voice telling him that this was just an excuse to fantasise about Zim and let his imagination run wild.

When Zim came really close I…

…He'd felt like his blood was on fire, he was breathless, dizzy, tingling all over. Adrenaline had set his heart beating wildly so that all he could hear was the rapid violent thumps and Zim's voice echoing strangely in his head. He's felt drawn towards him, like a magnet. He'd wanted to move closer and yet his limbs had turned to lead. He wanted to touch him, hold him, savour the sensation of an Irken…

Dib sat up sharply and tried to stop himself from thinking the next word but it was too late, Dib could already imagine the feel of his lips, the taste of Zim's mouth, the sensation of his tongue probing and moving against his own... Dib tried to fight it but eventually he gave up and let denial slip away, allowing his imagination to take him ever deeper. Dib forgot all about 'why' and 'how can I stop this' and allowed himself to day dream until Gaz came in and dragged him into the kitchen to eat. Dib glowered at her over his dinner. Didn't she realise what wonderful thoughts she had interrupted? Didn't she know what beautiful sensations had been shooting along his body at the very thought of Zim's touch she had spoilt by thumping him to bring him back to reality?

Reality. Suddenly Dib was brought back down to Earth and hit it much harder than Gaz's thump. He couldn't believe he'd allowed himself to think such thoughts about the enemy! Why was he thinking about Zim in this way? It was suddenly clear; Zim had meant to distract him so that he could plan yet another attempt at world domination! Dib leapt to his feet and cried out, "Nice try, Zim! But it takes more than that to disarm me!"

Gaz glared at him and took her dinner into the living room. For a brief second the thought that Zim had intended him to think about whether the human race was worth defending flashed across his mind but was instantly dismissed. No, dib knew that Zim had wanted to drive him mad with some sort of twisted desire. Dib had half a mind to rush over to Zim's base and gloat over this revelation but he hesitated and a far more cunning idea slipped into his mind. So that was how Zim wanted to play? Well fine. Dib would fight fire with fire. Fire that burned white hot.

Dib cackled to himself for a while then had a sudden flashback. When he had laughed similarly as he had leapt into the air from a speeding train two weeks ago. Dib paused and remembered for the first time what he had forced himself to forget: those strange sensations as he had lain on top of Zim, breathing in his soft alien scent, the feel of his body pressed alongside his, listening to the sound of the alien's rapid and then calmer, more gentle breathing. Dib shivered and slouched back into his seat his fantasies suddenly feeling a lot more real. He wondered if Zim was actually playing with his mind and that he was taking subtle hints that weren't there. Dib shook his head. No, Zim was definitely up to something. He always was.

Dib smiled as he thought back to the idea of outmanoeuvring Zim by playing his own game. He'd make Zim feel exactly the way he did and then the invader would be too confused to plot the Earth's destruction. Dib smirked to himself and leaving his dinner untouched ran out of the house, heading straight to Zim's base, once again pushing away the thought that this was just an excuse to get up close to the alien and feel those wonderfully painful sensations again.

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And now I turn to you, oh great Reviewers! Send me your opinions and I shall update soon... 


	3. Dogs of War

Sorry for the long wait, college and my new job have been taking up most of my time. However, I am taking advantage of the fact that I am ill to update for all my fellow ZADR fans. Grr… fanfiction is lumping words together again I keep having tore-upload this chapter :(

**Katca Mcadar:** Thank you :)

**Princess of Despair:** Glad you like it, sorry for the wait!

**.Serenade. of. Prayer.:** NO! Not the protractor! Have mercy! DON'T HURT ME! I'll update sooner, I promise! O.O

**WyattTheEd:** Thank you :)

**Chickens:** Here is more (hopefully) for your enjoyment :)

**Aseret Kitsune:** Thank you :)

**Bee Bop:** ZADR FOREVER indeed! Long may the slashy ficyness bring pleasure to all :D

**Andalitebandit-6:** It is an honour to be reviewed by one of my favourite authors! Thank you, I always try to be as vivid in my descriptions as possible so it's good to know I am successful!

**Mystery Reviewer:** Mwhahahahahaaa! Cliffhangers of evilness are my speciality! Thank you for reviewing :)

Now, onto the angsty romance stuff!

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**CHAPTER 3- DOGS OF WAR**

Dib seemed to have suddenly lost his nerve. He hovered in Zim's street pacing, wondering if the alien would read too much into this. Surely he would know that Dib was simply playing him at his own game, that there was nothing else in it. The last thing Dib wanted was Zim pushing him out of his base in anger thinking that Dib was uncontrollably in love with him. Dib twitched a little at the thought. That would simply turn the whole situation around and he would be humiliated not triumphant. He wanted to make Zim feel small and intimidated, lost and confused, not angry and homophobic. Dib was seriously having second thoughts but just as he turned to leave he found himself flat on his face as he was glomped by GIR.

"You have a big head!" the robot cried affectionately.

"I do not," Dib said grumpily, trying and failing to stand up. after a short struggle he managed to surge to his feet and begin walking away. GIR looked sadly after him, then an insane grin slid across his disguised face.

"Where're you goin'?" he called out.

"Home," Dib replied. "It was a stupid idea anyway," he muttered to himself.

"You can come and watch TV with me!" GIR yelled enthusiastically. Dib was about to politely decline the invitation when GIR said sadly, "Master's gone out and I'm looonely."

Dib stopped in his tracks. If Zim had gone out then he would arrive back tired and unprepared for a surprise attack on his senses. Dib would have the upper hand and if things went horribly wrong he could always say GIR had insisted he did it or else he'd sing the whole of the Doom song. Dib had once heard GIR insist that Zim let him dress his master in a pink flowery dress or else he'd sing the Doom song. Much to Dib's surprise and amusement Zim had given in immediately. With this in mind Dib took GIR's proffered hand and let the puppy disguised robot lead him to the weirdly shaped base that Zim called his house. Once there GIR shut the door, threw off his disguise, dropped onto the sofa, switched on the TV and instantly became absorbed in a thrilling advert for loo roll.

"I love this show," he said with a sigh to Dib and promptly forgot him. Dib shrugged and took advantage of this to explore Zim's house. He wished he could see Zim's real base but he needed to be here, hidden in the dark when Zim came home. He moved into the shelter of the kitchen and waited. The minutes dragged on and Dib began to feel nervous. He was on the verge of giving up when he heard the door open and Zim stood framed in the doorway. GIR jumped up to greet his master with a hug but Zim pushed him away.

"Not now GIR." He sounded tired. The alien looked drained as he heavily pulled off his disguise. Dib wasn't sure if Irkens could cry but he thought that if they could then Zim was on the verge of doing so. What was wrong with him? Dib watched the alien shuffle towards the kitchen and realised he had failed. He couldn't attack Zim when he was tired like this, it didn't seem fair. Then a sudden fleeting memory of the feelings Zim's attack had evoked in him surfaced and he crouched down, ready to attack. Zim flicked on the light and there was a moment of confusion. He blinked in surprise and stared at the human in his kitchen for a while before the anger kicked in.

Dib should have attacked then but something made him hesitate and, quite suddenly, all the fire went out of him. He felt like the child he was, suddenly afraid. This was Zim's domain, here he was master. Zim's eyes narrowed in anger as he took in the sight of the boy crouched on the floor. His pale complexion flushed back to its normal green colour and those startlingly red eyes burned in a way that made Dib wish he was any where but here.

"What. Are. You, Doing here?" he asked, voice tight with controlled rage at finding Dib intruding on his privacy when he was so tired.

"I…" Dib struggled to think of a reply but suddenly found his voice had become high-pitched and fell silent. Zim advanced on him and he stood up hurriedly. He backed away from the angry alien until he could go no further.

"What are you doing in my house Dib?" he was too angry to insult him and that was when Dib knew he had crossed the line; whatever game Zim was playing before he wasn't playing now. Now he was tired and angry and filled with a burning hate that only Dib and the skool dinners could evoke in him. Dib scrambled backwards, up onto a chair, then the table, anything, anything to escape those smouldering eyes. Zim leapt up after him and stood over him. They stayed like that for a while, eyes locked in combat. Dib knew that Zim could see his fear and he didn't like it. He had pride too, for God's sake. Zim stared at the human, body tense with anger and then he sighed and the fire faded from his eyes and his body relaxed. His shoulders sagged and he turned away and dropped wearily off the table.

"Go home, Dib."

Dib slid off the table after him but Zim headed to the toilet and flushed himself down it without a further glance at the human. Dib began to shake and the anger that had left Zim seemed to have infected him. Zim couldn't do this to him! To make him tremble with fear and then walk away without further interest was just beyond insult. He marched over to the toilet and followed Zim down ready to do what he came to do.

Zim was busy on his computer, typing away madly, trying to drive his sadness away. Dib felt no compassion now, Zim had damaged his pride and he was going to make him pay. He crept up behind him and grinned when his presence went unnoticed. He inched closer, Zim was too preoccupied to pay attention, and his grin grew wider as he thought of what he was going to do. He leaned forwards, ever so slowly and then, extending his tongue, trailed it up the back of Zim's neck. The effect was immediate. Zim yelled in shock and leapt four feet into the air. When he landed he rounded on Dib and began pummelling him to the ground. Dib defended himself as best he could but he was no match for an angry Irken Invader, regardless of whether that Invader was defective or not.

"Zim," he choked, "Get off!"

Zim stopped trying to strangle his nemesis and glared down at him instead.

"What do you want human-filth?" he asked.

"Revenge," Dib replied and pushed Zim off. "But I've got it now so I'll just be on my way…"

Zim pushed him down again, all sadness driven away by anger. Dib could feel him shaking with rage.

"Revenge for what?" he hissed, his eyes like dark ruby slits.

"Come on!" Dib cried, "You can't deny that you've been messing with my mind. Well it won't work Zim! I'm not attracted to you so you can stop your sick games now!"

Zim blinked at him.

"Eh?"

"You can't deny it!" Dib pointed up at him accusingly.

"Eh?"

"You can't deny it!"

"Eh?"

"For God's sake, Zim, either say something intelligent or let me go."

Zim thought for a moment, opened his mouth, thought the better of it, closed it again and decided to let the human go instead.

"Well?" Dib said, feeling increasingly stupid by the second.

"Well what?" Zim snapped, "I have no idea what you're talking about so either you explain or get out. Now."

"You…! I…! And then you….!" He stopped when he saw the complete lack of comprehension on Zim's face. "Oh… nothing," Dib sighed and turned to go, leaving a thoughtful and still somewhat angry alien behind him.

Dib arrived, feeling defeated, in the kitchen only to be met by a crimson-eyed GIR.

"Intruder!" he stated and then chased Dib all the way home.

Dib flopped into bed and closing his eyes tried to ignore the acute embarrassment telling him that he'd misinterpreted the whole situation and had just made a complete fool of himself in front of his worst enemy and this war between them was getting stranger and stranger. Meanwhile, back in his base, Zim was left in utter confusion as to what Dib was raving about. Messing with his mind? Attracted to Zim? Well who wouldn't be? Zim was wonderful! He allowed himself a smug smile at that thought but it faded as he thought back to Dib's "revenge." The truth was, the real reason he had been angry was because he had rather enjoyed the sensation of Dib's tongue against his skin… Zim mentally slapped himself and then a slow, insane grin slid across his face. Mind games… what an ingenious idea… Zim congratulated himself on his brilliancy as he began to laugh.

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Now, review or doom shall fall upon you! Yes, doom, doom, DOOM! 


	4. Tainted Love

I HAVE THE DVD'S! My dad went to Las Vegas on a business meeting and he brought IZ back with him. It's cheaper in America of course and he didn't have to pay P&P as he would have had to have done if we'd bought it over the internet so… voila! I am sooooo happy!

Sorry (once again) for the long delay! The internet has been screwing me around and college seems determined to pile as much coursework on me as possible. I hope you all had a good Christmas, I did :)

* * *

**CHAPTER 4- TAINTED LOVE**

Dib awoke to the sound of rain pattering on the roof. For a few moments there was blissful peace as he listened to the rhythmic pounding and then his brain kicked in and horrible memories of the previous night flooded back. He screwed his face up in mental pain and tried to forget making such a hideous mistake. How could he have been so stupid as to think that Zim was trying to seduce him? Mind games… the only mind games were the ones his overactive imagination was inventing. He had a sinking feeling that he had simply invented Zim's Evil Seductive Plan to disguise his own warped fantasies. He felt sick with humiliation, dread and something like fear. It was wrong to feel this way about an alien! Especially one whose mind was bent on world domination, and he wanted to destroy mankind, for God's sake! That funny little voice at the back of Dib's brain whispered, _so what? They deserve it…_

"Shut up!" Dib muttered and forced himself to sit up. He hated that _knowledgeable_ part of himself. The part that told him humanity deserved to die, that he was crazy to keep trying to prove things people didn't want to know or didn't care about. It told him he was in denial about his feelings for Zim, that he obsessed over him too much for it to be professional interest… it was horribly _rational_. And Dib knew it was right but he wasn't ready to admit it. Yet. He thought back to the "final battle," the battle that had started it all. He had felt so secure, so comfortable resting on Zim. He had breathed in that strange alien scent; it was so comforting and at the same time unbearably intoxicating. He hated Zim. Hated him so much for wrong desires he made him feel. Dib stumbled out of bed and decided that food might make him feel better.

Shuffling downstairs and into the kitchen he didn't feel much better. His hair was a mess, still tousled from sleep and he knew he looked pale with dark shadows under his eyes that contrasted horribly with his pallor.

"You look sick," Gaz told him. He sighed and slumped into a chair and began to eat the cereal. It tasted like cardboard. Nothing abnormal about that though. Membrane's head floated above them on screen he glanced down at Dib and the screen wobbled as he shook his head.

"Son! Your sister is right! You should go back to bed."

Dib mumbled a reply and glared at the milky gloop in his bowl. He hated Zim for making him felt his way. So confused and so damn miserable. Dib was used to being humiliated the kids in skool but, somehow, when it was Zim, it was ten times worse. He told himself it was because he didn't like looking weak in front of his enemy. The voice whispered that it was because he wanted Zim's respect and Zim wouldn't respect an idiotic pushover. Dib pushed his breakfast away and trudged back upstairs but instead of going back to bed he switched on his computer and opened all the files he had containing information about Zim. There was so much. Picture after picture flashed before him; one of Zim without his disguise on (only the camera lens had been cracked in a fight a few minutes before so his face was too distorted to tell.) Zim's silhouette against the moon as he stood on the roof laughing triumphantly, a close up of Zim's undisguised face hidden in shadow, eyes like slits burning deep and red in the dark…

Dib wanted to scream and tear out his hair but he didn't have the energy to do so. He made do by sighing instead. He mentally cringed at the thought of how Zim would probably have interpreted the previous night's events. He stared miserably at the image on the screen. Those eyes, so passionate, narrowed in anger, hate and some other strange intensity that Dib couldn't work out. As he stared the despair and humiliation began to harden and form into something new. The raging hate was back but this time he couldn't deny that it was different. He didn't hate Zim because he wanted to destroy Earth, he hated him because of the way he made Dib want him and all the while he frantically wished he didn't. Dib shuddered at the thought of facing him again and dreaded skool the next day. To take his mind off these dark thoughts Dib sat and thought even darker ones. He plotted ways of exposing Zim before the skool in such ways that they had no choice but to believe.

He imagined the FBI marching in and dragging Zim away, kicking and screaming. Zim lying tied down on an autopsy table and Dib standing over him looking down as Zim's eyes narrowed in hate and Dib would know that those eyes would haunt him for the rest of his life but he wouldn't care. He would raise the scalpel and Zim wouldn't scream, he wouldn't betray even a flicker of fear and those fierce eyes would make Dib freeze. Then a metallic spider leg would break free from his PAK and Dib would drop the scalpel and back towards the door. But Zim would cut him off, ripping himself free of the restraining straps. And Dib would run, clamber onto the table and Zim would follow, slowly, deliberately until Dib's blood ran cold for fear. And then Zim would pin him down so he couldn't move look, fix him with those burning eyes, look down into the eyes of his nemesis and Dib's eyes would stare back up at him, afraid and tortured. On body fire, blood run cold. _Take me now_.

Dib's eyes snapped open and he shook himself to his senses. He shuddered and the twisted fantasy melted away. Dib shut down his computer and waited for peaceful quiet as the whirring hard drive fell silent. God, he hated that alien.

_x x x_

Zim paced the kitchen thoughtfully, every now and then glancing at the table where Dib had cowered before his mighty rage. Zim's eyes then flicked to the toilet where Dib had followed him down to his base. Then he replayed the strange events in his mind's eye. The Dib had crept up behind him and then done something strange and horribly pleasant. Unpleasant. He meant unpleasant. God it was a HORRIBLE experience! Zim coughed and scowled and scrubbed the back of his neck vigorously with one hand. He wondered what the Dib had meant by "messing with his mind" before deciding that it didn't matter. Zim hadn't been doing anything of the sort but he would start playing these mind games. Oh, what mind games he would play…! The results would be most interesting... his train of thought was interrupted by GIR demanding tacos. Zim pointed to a random cupboard and carried on thinking about his evil plan.

He needed to make the human feel confused and puzzled. Rather like Zim did about his reaction to Dib licking his neck. He shouldn't have enjoyed it at all… filthy human germs... Suddenly Zim's eyes narrowed and (what he thought was realisation) struck. So that was it! The Dib was trying to mess with Zim's mind!

"Oh, that HORRIBLE human!" He yelled. "Trying to confuse Zim with his pathetic mind games! Well, nice try Dib… but you failed! I guessed your evil plan!" and he began to laugh triumphantly.

"He can't hear you, you know," Zim's computer pointed out.

"Silence!" and he continued laughing. After a while he decided the computer had a point so Zim decided that he would wait until skool tomorrow to gloat.

_x x x_

Dib was late. Zim kept glancing anxiously at his desk. If the Dib wasn't in how could he rave about his triumph? When eventually Dib appeared he muttered an apology to Ms Bitters and scuttled to his seat. He looked as if he were trying to make himself as small and as unnoticeable as possible. Zim didn't like this change in his enemy's attitude and he studied the human intently all the time Ms Bitters was talking. He watched in confusion as Dib's pale face transformed from miserable to shocked to horrified to traumatised and then twisted into a strange expression that seemed to convey the whole lot all at once. Zim wondered why the horrible, twisted faces Dib was pulling were so strangely disturbing but when he actually registered what the disgusting scary educator-thing was saying Zim found he had every reason to feel as disturbed as Dib.

"The skool board has announced that due to a recent drop in the marriage rate that you are to be taught about love in skool so you recognise it as soon as possible when you experience its hideous nature later on in your horrible lives. I am not going to teach you about the kind of love that involves romance and flowers and chocolates because they all inevitably end in doom. So you are going to learn about the nastier forms, as you read from your horrible textbooks."

The class looked rather disturbed and Zita actually started crying.

"Sadists and obsessive compulsives," Ms Bitters announced, "turn to page 19762. Everyone else do the same. Now read."

Zim, who did not normally pay attention or do any work, found himself automatically opening the book and obeyed.

_Sadism _(he read)_- sexual pleasure obtained from watching or inflicting pain upon the subject of desire. Are you a sadistic lover? Take the quiz below and find out! _

Zim re-read this last sentence and after being absolutely sure he had read and understood it right, he decided to read on.

_Do you enjoy watching/participating in fights and violence?_

_Do you like inflicting pain on the subject, regardless of how they feel about it?_

_Do you crave power/like to feel powerful?_

_Do you like to dominate/control the subject?_

_Do you like making the subject afraid of you?_

_Do you believe yourself superior to others?_

_Do you enjoy being challenged?_

_WHAT DID YOU SCORE?  
Add up all the questions you answered 'yes' to.  
If you scored more than 0,you are a sadist! Congratulations!_

Zim blinked a few times at this but it wasn't until he read on that he realised why Dib was looking so horrified.

_Obsessive love- being unable to stop thinking/talking about subject of desire. Are you an obsessive compulsive lover? Take the quiz below and find out!_

_Is there someone you cannot stop thinking/talking about?_

_Do you keep interfering/ making yourself noticeable in their lives?_

_Have you ever stalked/considered stalking them?_

_Do you have hundreds of thousands of notes/pictures of the subject that you look at everyday? _

_Do you try to find out every single fact about the subject that you can?_

_Do you stare at the subject for hours on end? _

_Have you ever considered/actually installed surveillance in their home?_

_WHAT DID YOU SCORE? _

_Add up all the questions you answered 'yes' to.  
If you scored more than 0, then you are an obsessive compulsive lover! Congratulations!_

"Ms Bitters?"

Ms Bitters glared at the pupil who had dared to speak. Torque, who had not understood any of what he had just read, carried on speaking anyway.

"What is an obsessive compulsive?"

Ms Bitters looked horribly thoughtful. Then she pointed at the still traumatised-looking Dib.

"Dib is a good example. He gets ideas into his head and gets obsessed with them. Like that Zim is an alien, Bigfoot was in his garage and ghosts exist."

"So…" Torque screwed up his face in the effort of thinking, "Dib is obsessed with Zim?"

"Yes," Ms Bitters replied.

"So that means…that Dib is in love with Zim?" Zita asked, looking slightly shocked.

"Yes," said Ms Bitters.

"Where's the logic in that?"asked the Letter M.

"It says right here," Zita pointed at the text book and read out the Obsessive Lover quiz.

At this point Dib ran out of the classroom screaming and tearing at his hair. Zim felt enlightened. Of course the Dib was in love with him! Why not? It was obvious Zim was amazing! He wouldn't be surprised if everyone acknowledged his superiority and was in love with him! Zim chuckled to himself. The Dib hadn't been trying to mess with his mind after all, he had simply interpreted Zim's attacks as form of sadistic love and- Zim stopped laughing and the gleeful look was replaced with one of complete and utter horror. _Sadistic love…

* * *

_

And, because I was feeling very inspired, I wrote another chapter so this wouldn't end on a cliffhanger. Aren't I lovely? 


	5. Obsession?

A short chapter to follow CH 4 because I was too impatient. So I added this at the same time. Enjoy!

* * *

**CHAPTER 5- OBSESSION?**

They needed to talk. Now, this minute, this second. Zim tore out of the classroom, as soon as he was in the corridor his spider legs erupted from his Pak and he ran as fast as he could, following the dying echo of Dib's screams. Zim paused outside the boys toilets and cocked a non-existent ear at the sound coming from within. It seemed that Dib was having a breakdown. Zim pushed the door open and retracting his spider legs he dropped to the ground and leant against the locked door where he could hear Dib still screaming faintly.

"Dib-Stink?"

Dib moaned. Zim. Of all people who had to see him now, it was Zim. Why was he here? Had he realised the way he made Dib feel? Had he come to gloat over Dib's breakdown? Or had he come to kiss him better? This thought brought hysterical laughter and then fresh howls of anguish from Dib and Zim's voice cut through the wails.

"Stop snivelling and open the door. Now! Pathetic human," he added as an afterthought.

Dib shook his head despite the fact that Zim couldn't see it. There was an uncomfortable silence. Zim began to feel even angrier. He needed to talk to the Dib NOW.

"Open the door Dib-worm, or I will open it for you."

Dib made an odd sound half way between a hiccough and a hysterical sob. On the other side of the door Zim's eyes narrowed and Dib tensed himself for an explosion that would blast the door off its hinges. He was surprised to see instead one spider leg extend over the cubicle and unlock the door from the inside. The door swung creakily open and Dib blinked at the sight of the angry alien standing in the doorway framed by dingy light.

"Out," Zim said and attempted to drag the human out of the cubicle. Dib clung to the pipes and Zim found that the human was stronger than he had thought. Eventually after a great deal of pulling and Dib screaming hysterically, Zim gave up and stepped into the cubicle himself. It was a bit of a squash but there was enough room for Dib to take a few steps backward. He did so and sat down on the toilet lid and stared miserably at Zim. Zim locked the cubicle door and coughed.

"We need to talk."

Dib sighed. It appeared that his suspicions were confirmed. That horrible lesson had made Zim realise just how deep Dib's obsession was.

"Go on," he managed eventually. His voice was strangely high pitched. Zim glared at him. He hated seeing his enemy like this, so weak and _pathetic_. It wasn't… right. Dib carried on staring and suddenly Zim couldn't take it anymore. Dib was stronger than this. It was one of the things he li- Zim stopped this thought before it could develop any further and taking aim, punched Dib squarely across the face.

The sheer force of the attack and the shock brought Dib violently back to normality.

"What was that for you stupid alien!" and he punched him back. There wasn't much room for Zim to dodge so the blow did quite a lot of damage. Zim hit him back and it turned rather painful as Dib attacked his attacker, fists flailing. After a while Zim managed to grab Dib's wrists and hold him still long enough to make his displeasure at this turn of events evident. Dib glared back and Zim released him, pushing him away.

"What do you want Zim?" he asked finally.

"We must talk. This… lesson we have just suffered. It has left me feeling confused."

Dib looked puzzled. Confused? What was there to be confused about? He was in love with an alien, whom he hated, confirmed by a quiz in a text book. What more evidence did he need?

"Tell me, Earth-Monkey, do I… obsess over world domination?"

"No Zim, you couldn't care less about it." Dib's attempt at sarcasm was received with a glare.

"I shall take that as a yes. Now, do I (a normal human wormbaby!) enjoy the thought of destroying the human race… say… anyone in particular?"

"Yes, (mumble mumble.)"

"What did you say?" The alien tapped an impatient foot.

"Me," Dib repeated a little louder, flushing in the dim light.

"Yeeess," Zim agreed thoughtfully and then looked annoyed with himself.

"Now. Do you obsess over your _paranormal studies? _

"Yes."

"And what about the AMAZINGNESS that is Zim?

"I'm not sure I know what you mean," Dib mumbled.

"Me, Dib, do you obsess about _me_?"

There was a long, long pause and then, finally, "Yes."

Zim's eyes flashed a triumphant ruby red behind their lenses and he grinned, there was no other word for it, sadistically.

"Now, Dib, I am going to do a little test, and you are going to tell me if you enjoy it or not."

There was something in Zim's eyes made Dib's blood run cold.

* * *

Mwhahahahahahahahahaaaa! CLIFFHANGER! Review and I will ease your agitation by updating sooner! 

Happy New Year in 4 days time! Woo!


	6. Mutual

**Dark Fairy of Doom:** I am a chocoholic… I LOVE chocolate! So thank you!

**Lechan**,** Kamokat** and **Hazel:** Thank you! I have updated as commanded!

**Robo-Sapien:** MWAHAHAHAHAAA! Yes, I am truly a master of EVIL mind tricks! Now, read or shall I play more tricks and make you think you are not a ZADR fan…

**Katca Mcadar:** Lol, I did indeed enjoy those chocolates, although that was a long time ago… and stop with the bad puns, or I shall eat you tomorrow in college.

**Ryokura: **Yay! First fic of 2006! I am not mean… just evil… EVIL!

**EvilRobotZombieLoofaOverlord:** Thank you, I hope this satisfies your desire for ZADR hotness :-)

**Spiritwave13:** Unhand me at once sir! Or I shall have to take desperate measures… such as, not updating this chapter after all! MWAHAHAHAHAAA! Hmm… I really like evil, villainous laughter.

**Aseret Kitsune:** OMG thank you! (bows and worships endlessly)

**Anonymous** person: Thank you! Reading that made me very happy :-)

**Techno Doofus:** Thank you for reviewing! I hope that this has been worth the wait!

**Oo-Straightjacket Sweetheart-oO: **Yay! Another ZADR fan! Thank you for the review, I hope you enjoy this chapter too :-)

Ack. Long time no update but here it is, the final chapter… enjoy!

* * *

**CHAPTER 6- MUTUAL**

Dib took a hasty step backwards, the intensity of Zim's gaze causing conflict within. _Run, _said one part of his brain. _Freeze_,said another and that irritating reasonable voice was back again whispering, _just give in_. Give in to what? Dib wondered and instantly stopped when the answer arrived rather suddenly in the form of Zim grabbing him roughly and shoving him against the cubicle wall. Dib swallowed. _Ah..._ _Crap._ He closed his eyes, unable to take the intensity of that gaze any longer. The next thing he knew, he was in a lot of pain and just as his eyes snapped open, everything went dark.

Dib came to, and felt incredibly uncomfortable. When his eyes decided to do their job he noted that they were malfunctioning. The world was upside down. No, wait, _he _was upside down and feeling uncomfortably hot. Dib arrived back to full consciousness with a sudden jolt. He was dangling upside down from the ceiling, with his hands tied behind him, over a large pot of clear gelatine. It was bubbling slightly, making gentle _gloop_ing noises. It was clearly very hot, Dib could feel wave after wave of hot air flow over him.

_I suppose this is my punishment_, he thought miserably. It was stupid to allow Zim to guess his feelings like that. Stupid feelings. Dib sighed. No wonder people thought he was insane. Lusting after a melodramatic, psychopathic alien bent on world domination wasn't normal.

"HI, COW!"

Dib jumped and looking up saw GIR clinging to the rope with a pair of scissors in his hands.

"Wanna get down?" he asked with a happy grin.

"Ah…" Dib glanced at the viscous liquid below and violently shook his head.

"OKAY!" came the scream as GIR completely ignore this reply and began sawing vigorously at the rope anyway.

"AARGH! NO! STOP!" Dib yelled, struggling in a vain attempt to make the insane piece of metal stop.

"GIR!"

"Yeees master?"

"Go… do stuff… someplace that is… not here."

GIR looked sad and waved the scissors in the air hopefully. Straining his eyes downwards Dib could see Zim shake his head.

"No GIR. You must go. The Dib human and I need to be alone for this plan to work." The alien grinned up at the dangling human. Dib swallowed. GIR slid down the rope, yanked his trench coat off and parachuted down to the ground.

"HEY!" he cried but fell silence when he realised that his protest was falling on deaf ears. Dib paused for a second. Neither Zim nor GIR had ears, so did what he had just thought made sense? He was brought of this reverie by Zim's voice calling up to him.

"Comfortable?"

"Not really."

"Then perhaps this will help." The alien grinned sadistically and pressed a button on the wall. Dib plummeted towards the liquid at an alarming rate. Suddenly Zim pressed the button again to stop the human from falling any further, laughing manically as the Dib's screams resounding in his ears… wait a minute. What screams? Zim glared at Dib.

Dib rolled his eyes.

"Real scary Zim. It's the most predictable trick in the whole history of villainy. The villain _always _stops before the hero reached the lava or acid or whatever and then rambles on about how he/she will rule the world, giving the hero enough time to be rescued or free himself. It happens on nearly every TV programme."

Zim looked furious. Stupid Earthanoid television, revealing his AMAZING secret plan. Zim glanced up in time to catch Dib smirk cockily at him.

"YOU DARE LAUGH AT ZIM!"

Dib was about to make a scathing reply whena sudden creaking, snapping noise made both human and alien glance up at the rope. Slowly it began to snap, the strain of Dib's weight too much after GIR's attack.

"Eh?" Zim said, blinking in confusion. This wasn't supposed the happen…

"AARRRRGGGHHH!" Dib did scream this time as he plunged into the gel. This was it, he would be boiled alive! The burning! The horrible BURNING! Dib rose to the surface, screaming in agony and then stopped when he realised that he was actually completely unharmed and that the gel was not hot at all. It _gloop_ed at him in an offended way.

"Eh? But-"

Zim laughed manically.

"Foolish human! As if Zim would kill you that way! No no, I have a better plan for you."

Dib stared at the alien a little nervously and pulled himself out of the vat. The gel smelled quite pleasant actually, rather like lavender… but how to explain the heat? Dib found himself caught by Zim's eyes and a wave of hotness rushed over him. Ah, well, that explained that then.

Dib shivered a little, feeling almost naked without his coat on and more than a little vulnerable with his hands tied. Zim's smile widened and reached out and pulled the human towards him.

"Now then. How did you like that?"

"Like what? You mean the whole being dangled above a vat of what appeared to be dangerous gel and then falling to what I thought to be my death?"

"Yes, yes. That."

"Um… pretty… damn exhilarating."

"Good." Zim said and kissed him.

Whatever Dib had been expecting it was not this, and yet, it was just what he had wanted. He gave in instantly. Everything, everything was real. This was no day dream, no torturous fantasy in the black of night. This was real. It was real and hot and dangerous and Dib _loved _it. Zim… the taste of him, the softness of his mouth and the feel of that lithe body crushing his own. Delicate but so strong.

He wanted his hands free. He twisted his hands behind him, ignoring the pain until they were slick, whether with sweat or blood he couldn't tell. Eventually Zim put him out of his misery by extending a metallic leg from his PAK and slicing through the rope. And now it was Dib's turn to be in charge. As soon as his hands were free he grabbed Zim's wrists, forcing him backwards into the wall. Zim didn't bother resisting.

Hands exploring, hands pinned, hands caressing hands inflicting pain. Mouths biting, licking, sucking, kissing. When they eventually broke apart, Dib looked with hazy eyes into Zim's and said, "This is really messed up, you know."

"Of course Zim knows."

"… I hate you."

"Mutual."

"Then what do you want, Zim?"

"To see you suffer."

"Mutual."

Love. A chemical reaction. Hormones combining lust with a desire to care for another being. Only they didn't care. They didn't want the other to be healthy and happy. They wanted them to hurt and to be one that made it so Pain. Mental and physical torture. Pain and pleasure mingled as one. A hated love and a much loved hate. A tainted, black and bruising love that they loved as much as they hated it. And they wouldn't have it any other way because couldn't exist in any other way. Sadistic and obsessive. A strange love.

* * *

That's it! The end! I was considering making this M rated but then I remembered that Dib is still in 'Skool' so it would've been a bit odd. This also turned out to be a little shorter than I had hoped… Anyhoo, please review and tell me what you think!

_AND _A huge thank you to all my reviewers; you guys kept me going :-)


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